


Haunt Me

by apostapals (apostapal)



Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-04
Updated: 2016-11-04
Packaged: 2018-08-28 15:31:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8451835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apostapal/pseuds/apostapals
Summary: Prompt fill. Losing a twin is like losing a limb.





	

Carver dreams about her sometimes, early on.

He dreams about being in Bethany’s place. About how, for the first time in their lives, he wasn’t the one standing between her and anything that would dare take her from them. Carver dreams about when they were small, when she’d wake in the night terrified of being taken by the templars and he’d soothe her worries.

He remembers having complained so much about the running. He knows Bethany always felt guilty. He feels terrible now for having caused her to think protecting her was ‘inconvenient’ to him.

In his dreams, Bethany is always forgiving. It almost makes it harder than if she was mad. If she was upset with him, like he’s upset with himself, he’d feel better somehow.

“ _Carver!_ ”

For just a moment, Hawke sounds like her. Then, all at once, it’s gone and he’s staring up at his older sister. She frowns and nudges his shoulder again.

“What?” he asks, sharper than he means to.

“You were talking in your sleep.” she says, “Seemed upset so I… Carver, are you crying?”

Carver just rolls over and refuses to speak to her about it.

He doesn’t start really _seeing_ Bethany until he becomes a warden. At first, he assumes it’s due to the taint. It’s not till he speaks with Warden-Commander Surana about it that he realizes this can’t be the case.

“It’s been a while since she died, hasn’t it?” she ventures, after the impact of finding out this is his own heartbroken mind. “You must miss her.”

Carver thinks of seeing her, just in the corner of his eye, when they were picking through the Deep Roads last. He thinks of how _overjoyed_ he was, just briefly, at the thought of her being there again.

He sighs. “It’s not just like I lost my sister.” he admits, “She was my twin, it was like I lost part of _myself_.”

Surana nods and reaches over to pat his gloved hand. Carver wants to pull away–not because it isn’t comforting but because it is. He doesn’t.

“Is it just in the Deep Roads?” she asks.

He thinks a moment, then nods.

“Perhaps you’re lyrium sensitive.” she ventures. “With the magic in your family there could be… something in you that reacts to it?”

Carver shrugs. She gives him a month of guard duty at the Keep in lieu of another Deep Roads trip and he gladly takes it. Just to see if she’s right. She is, but he’s begging to go on another trip only two weeks in.

“Why?” she asks, brow arched.

“I… I miss her.” Carver says simply.

There’s something all-together unnerving about seeing Bethany in the corner of his eye as he tromps through the Deep Roads but, at the same time, it almost makes things easier. Knowing she’s there, in some way, makes things easier.

“She’s like your guardian spirit, huh?” Surana teases, nudging him with her elbow.

Carver actually smiles at this.

“I think, maybe you’re right.” he says, catching sight of Bethany just in his peripheral. “She probably doesn’t get why I’m always coming back to this place when it tried to kill me.”

Surana just laughs. “Oh, I doubt it.” she says, “She’s your twin. If anyone understands why you do what you do, it’s her, yeah?”

Carver is almost certain he can feel Bethany smiling. He does too, just for a moment.

“Yeah, you’re right.”


End file.
